7 Stages of Wages

So I’ve noticed that I go through a range of stages when waiting for and then receiving my wages.


1. I’m so rich

Stage 1 is that feeling you have the day of and the day after being paid. Your bank account is full to the brim of all that lovely money you’ve been slaving away for for the past two weeks or month. The possibilities of that money are endless. You could literally buy a panda if you wanted because you are so rich.

2. Oh, I forgot about bills. That’s ok.

Stage 2 is having to pay for the stupid little things that never go away. These include rent, electricity, gas, water, phone bill, internet bill, pet insurance, car insurance, health insurance etc. Now after you pay these you see a huge big chunk of your awesome money gone. But that’s ok. You can deal with it. You still have enough for maybe a teddy of a panda. See it as practice for when you buy the real one next fortnight.

3. I’m safe…I think

Stage 3 is thinking and believing you still have ridiculous amounts of money that you can spend on whatever you want. In reality you have about $300, if that, left. You decide that you should go shopping and treat yourself because you worked damn hard for this and why not!

4. Shit.

You have a new dress and a house that has electricity and all that jazz. You just cant afford food now. It’s always the little things that you forget.

5. Double shit.

So you’ve used your credit card to buy food. This is good. You only have about $13 left in you account to last you two weeks but at least your handy credit card is there. Now just to remember to add this to stage 2 next pay.

6. Craving.

You have just under a week to wait for your next wage. You’re craving it. You’re dreaming about that Panda you know you will definitely be able to afford this time round. You think of all the new possibilities of the next wage. You talk yourself out of them and tell yourself you don’t need any more dresses or clothes. You tell yourself you’ll buy food first.

7. I’m so rich!

You’ve been paid! Yay.

Repeat stages 1-7

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